I don’t want this to come across the wrong way, but you have to start saying no. You have to say no to the wrong things. To things that go against your values. Things that disrupt your Architectural process. Things that conflict with who you are.
To provide the best for those people you say yes to, you need to say no to some other people.
Start being selective with your clients. Only work with the best people. Yes will cost you more in the long run than you could ever imagine. Decisions you make now affect your future possibilities.
Make sure what you are saying yes to is the most important thing for you to be doing right now. Make sure it’s something that gets you excited. Derek Sivers said There is no yes. You are either saying hell yes to someting or it’s a now.
First, does it align with your values? Second, is it an opportunity that will progress you forward to becoming the person you want to be? And third. Will it be fun?
Those are the questions I ask before saying yes. I’m working on it anyway. You need your own framework. How will you decide what you give your attention to?
Stop telling people yes right away. You have to think things over. Understand what it is they are asking and how it’s going to impact you and your goals. Your default should be no. If it’s not an immediate no then it should be, let me check my availability.
If you’re good and have thought things over and can take on the opportunity then it’s a yes. Sometimes you just know it’s something you want to do…
I have a habit of saying yes to way too much. I’ve been pushing back a little to see the impacts of saying no. At first you feel guilty. It feels wrong. Like your letting the person down.
Then you start to feel ok and eventually relieved that you passed on the opportunity.
Now don’t start saying no to get around responsibilities. When you say yes to something, either in the past or future. There will be things that come with that yes. Responsiblities.
You need to fulfill those. This shows you the importance of making the right decision during the process of selecting what it is your going to take on.
Once you’ve taken on that responsibility you have to fulfill it. You have to complete what you set out to do. People are relying on you. They depend on what it was you agreed to do. So complete that thing and learn from the experience.
Would you say yes to that project again in the future. Should you agree to the same things. Were there some things you would change? Make note of them. Keep tabs. You can’t grow in the future unless you keep track of the past.
So to wrap this up. Focus on what’s important. Understand that when you say yes to something you’re saying no to many other things. Don’t say yes unless it’s a hell yes. Your default should be no. But live up to responsibilities you have already agreed to.